i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize