I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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