i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
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Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
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She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
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