That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
even my farts smell like vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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