smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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