he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Do vagina's smell?
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Randomize