break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize