I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
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I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
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I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
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