I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
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Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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