I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize