Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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