1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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