Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize