It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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