This is not my ceiling
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
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