Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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