If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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