i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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