do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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