Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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