I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
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