Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
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