Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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