No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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