just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize