forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
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Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
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I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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