Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Randomize