just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
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dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
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