chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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