We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Life is so much better after having sex.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize