He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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