she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
When are your genitals available?
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize