i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize