I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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