Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
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Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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