from now on my penis is your penis
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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