smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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