There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
You ruined the universe
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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