You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
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