Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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