You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
You were trust falling into bushes
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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