I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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