Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
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He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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