you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
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