I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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