I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize