I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize