That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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