conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
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