I hate all girls vehemently.
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
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I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize